Can love come into our lives by means of a bottle?
Craig Sullivan, a lonely man in Scotland searching for his soulmate, certainly hoped so.
Inspired by The Police’s song Message in a Bottle, Sullivan sent out over 2,000 message-bearing bottles a few summers ago along local beaches.
The good news is that he got a response. The bad news is that it was from the Scottish Environmental Protection Agency. Their reply was considerably less romantic than Sullivan might have hoped: Please stop littering.
A few years ago I ran across an ad for a little bottle called Love’s Bouquet. Alongside were the words, “Never Be Lonely Again!”
Then came this compelling message: “Just a touch or two of this powerful ‘love-potion-in-a-bottle’ is all you need to captivate a new partner or revive a flagging romance. Love’s Bouquet contains a fiercely irresistible chemical formula which DRIVES the opposite sex to you without conscious awareness on their part. They can’t help themselves. Age or appearance simply doesn’t matter.”
There was also this testimony: “Jennifer from Wisconsin says, ‘Men who were shy are now genuinely unable to stay away from me.’”
Is this at last the answer to our society’s search for unity, and every church’s quest for richer fellowship? If we put just a few drops of Love’s Bouquet into the communion wine, will all of our petty squabbles finally be replaced by heartfelt affection?
What we learn from Scripture is that real love is not about chemistry. And it’s not about feelings.
It is not a tidal wave of romantic sentiments that washes us helplessly from one experience and from one partner to another.
If there really is a potion that drives other people to our sides, against their conscious awareness, then what is driving them is most certainly not love.
Twenty-three times in the New Testament we are commanded to love each other. Can feelings be commanded? They cannot. But behaviors can be commanded, and attitudes can be deliberately cultivated.
In the Bible, love means seeking the good of other people even if we never have warm or positive feelings toward them. For many of us, this may be the very word we need to hear concerning certain family members.
We don’t love other people because they are attractive or lovable.
We love them because God has poured his own love into our hearts, and his call is for us to be in relationship with other people by seeking their highest good, just as God seeks our highest good at every turn.
“Great lovers” aren’t those who “can’t stay away from each other.” They are people who by God’s grace learn to keep a lid on their anger…who are patient longer than they ever thought possible…who get excited about somebody else’s big day…and who refuse to keep records of emotional hurts.
Here’s how Jesus put it to his disciples at the Last Supper:
“I am giving you a fresh command: Have a heart for one another out of the resource of my heart for you – like that, have a heart for one another! Here is the way everyone out there will know you have been discipled to me – the way you have a heart for one another” (John 13:34-35, translation by Dale Bruner).
The best offer of love you’ll receive this Valentine’s Day won’t be dispensed in a bottle or wash up on a beach.
It’s the assurance that God’s love for us has no expiration date, and can in fact become the deep well out of which we learn to love each other.
Just the same, it might be wise to steer clear from Wisconsin residents named Jennifer.
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